Saturday 4/21 Long Beach Invite

For those that have never seen it, this a glimpse of the coveted trophy displayed by world renown hand model, Patrick Deitz. (Since no headshot was provided in this photo, SAG fees were waived, and the “King & Queen” staff had to only pay hand talent fees. This cost will not be absorbed by the “King & Queen” players/members.)


Here are some interesting stats:

There have been 16 out of 18 days thus far in April where the temperature on average has been almost eight degrees below seasonal norm. Rainfall this month in most areas has exceeded eleven inches. Not much opportunity to play ball in that kind of weather.

With that in mind, what does one do to help alleviate this situation… we call in those wondrous weather wranglers of the old days… Phil Horigan and his band of mystical merry men! Yes, some of you may be too young to remember these guys, but back in the old “King & Queen” days, we called on Phil and his merry team to perform their orgiastic ritual weather magic on a weekly basis (every Thursday night at midnight). Some of you may recall the spring of 98 and 99… absolutely no rain on any of those weekends! I think we held ten tournaments in both of those seasons. So with desperate times come desperate measures… forcing us (Graham, Zak, and me) to enlist the help of Phil once again. Instead of the usual Thursday night performance, we begged them to begin on Wednesday night just in case an additional night was needed due to all of the inclement weather we have had as of late. So last night Phil and his mystical merry men underwent their ritual. This one was especially sultry… an orgiastic ritual above all others… with a slight drizzle in the evening, slippery smooth skin emitted a vaporous steam from the delightfully heated bodily friction that could be seen in the dull yellow door light of the rooftop doorway. I must take a moment to recover since my pulse is now racing…………… now… where was I?

Yes!!! The ritual on the first evening has paid off in a huge way!! Suddenly the skies are going to be blue once again this Saturday with an amazing turn of events! Cast away are they gray and bleak skies of yesterday… and the day before that… and before that… As a matter of fact, the sky will be se clear on this perfect spring day that one will almost be able to see the PLANET of Pluto if one actually has a portable Hubble telescope with that cool new color immersed dark energy imaging feature!

With that mentioned, we would like to invite everyone to the Long Beach “King & Queen” Invitational! Saturday’s temperature is going to be a stunning 66 degrees with a mild seven MPH wind. And bring plenty of suntan lotion, as the UV rating will reach an astonishing level of seven!

All “King & Queen” rules still apply.
$5 for all entrants unless you are bringing a net.
No handsets over the net. A handset must be touched by your partner.

We play just west of National Blvd and the lifeguard station. Can’t miss it… it’s that large building in the middle of the beach with the large sign that reads, “Lifeguard Station.”

Start time is 9am. Last person there owes $10… anyone showing up after 9pm will be required to consume pre-tourney penalty shots of tequila.

For those taking the train out of Penn Station… the last train you can catch, and still be on-time, is the 7:48 to Long Beach.

Okay… who is in? Who can bring a net?